Dual....:-)
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
He waved at a guy who drove by while we were having sex in the back of a rental car in a hospital parking garage prior to visiting family. Almost made me feel guilty but I liked it too much.
Randomize
