Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
Randomize
