Whod you bang
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Listen, i know this is weird for you, but as your fuck buddy, id prefer if you didnt fuck her.
Youre asking too much from me
Randomize
