youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
It's official drugs can't kill me
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
