What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize