DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
Randomize
