I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
She opened a beer bottle with her armpit and then gave me a cigarette from the waistband of her underwear. I dont know if I want to be her or marry her.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Randomize
