Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Randomize
