So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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