how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
