so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
