About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
And to think..we used to do everything sober...
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I broke my wrist trying to give him a blow job...
And this is why we can’t have nice things
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