would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
