so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
im shotgunning beers in the kitchen. alone. the cat is judging me.
Nope. Daytime is texting time. Night time is you send me naked pictures time.
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
Randomize
