yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
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