when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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