We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
Randomize
