Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Randomize
