He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Randomize
