i think my mom watched the whole time
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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