I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
Randomize