Also I am about to cut a ringtone from "Sex Machine" so James Brown can tell me to "get up, get on up" in the morning
I once woke up to the scream from 'get up offa that thing' and smacked my head on my desk
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
