I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
Awesome, the library of congress archived all tweets. Now my great great grandchildren can pinpoint the date they inherited alcoholism.
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
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