She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
What are you doing?
High. Watching Billy Mays infomercials...
That guy could sell me cancer.
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
I have post one night stand depression
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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