Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
It's only 9 and these two girls are already walking around Walmart barefoot and holding their heels. WE NEED TO STEP IT UP.
Randomize