Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
it wasn't lemon gatorade
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
