she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
can someone explain to me why i woke up under a twister sheet
All I really need to know is how to say "where is the bathroom" and "I don't take it in the butt anymore". I think that will suffice.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
sex in a hospital.. check
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
Randomize