i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
He sent me a picture of him trying to push his cock into a Gatorade bottle. I dont know if I'm impressed it didn't fit and disgusted that he sent me something so vile.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Randomize
