the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
i already hear my dad disowning me
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
you might get a letter about the baby you put in me. i was mad when i sent it.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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