can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Sorry about the whole your mom seeing my face up your ass situation
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Randomize
