he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
Do you remember whose house we're in?
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
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