Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
"just because you look like a short version of scarlet johanson does not mean I would immediately fuck you" that was the single.most difficult thing to say. but seriously I don't want the roots of the whore tree anywhere near my junk.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
