they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Randomize
