I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Tinder recommend to a friend: making threesomes easier since 2016
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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