check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
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