I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
I don't want my vagina anymore.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize