i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Walk of shame: Easter Edition. He is risen.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
