I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Woke up with string cheese braided into my hair- literally braided
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
Jessica just ate her lipstick. That's how the night is going
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize
