i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
Randomize
