normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
You came back with four clearly unattractive women and wanted to throw a dance party in my room.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
I've got five complains from the landlord about she being too loud during sex in two weeks I'm marrying her
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Randomize
