I was getting a bj with sports center on in the background
Da na na, na na naa
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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