i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Randomize
