big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
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