He showed me a four inch blond hair that grows out of his side. He calls it his little ray of sunshine. Please come get me.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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