gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Randomize