I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
forgot a fork. i am eating fettucini alfredo with a comb that i rinsed off the the bathroom sink. eating alone in my car. life doesn't get any sadder than this
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
Randomize
