so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
I gambled and lost. Had to pull into a funeral home to clean up with a copy of my resume.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
Randomize
