seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
Mom got me cough medicine that tastes like tequila . She said she took taste tests. Best mom ever.
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
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