good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
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