bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize