I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Ever try to swallow something and have it go up into your nose instead? Yeah, I just sneezed bacon.
Randomize
