I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Came up to an intersection and someone was blasting My Chemical Romance at like 9 AM. They're DEFINITELY having a good day
Randomize
